The Old Lady in the shoe has got nothing on me!

Trust me.. I mean it.

I mother six our house sanity is optional.

Sunday, May 17, 2009


Growing up, we faced all kinds of monsters.. as we got older we ignored them but they still exsist. Today, my blog is going to be (hopefully lighthearted) about the wonderful world of Monsters... Yep.. Monsters.

The sock monster- This creature steals and eats socks. Yet he never eats both of them, no he is more content to eat one of the pair leaving you to wonder where your socks are and to curse his name. Yep.. The sock monster never goes away and he only gets worse when the little kids become teenagers.

The money monster- This is the unexplainable expenses that pop up when you least expect it. No matter what you do, this monster will eat at whatever you are trying to save. He may be a small monster but there are times that he may be huge. Bad monster!!

The teenage monster- This is possibly the most vile of all monsters. This is what used to be your sweet toddler. The one that would grab your knees and say "I LOVE YOU!" is now this monster who comes downstairs scratches itself, belches and opens the refridgerator.. which brings me to the...

The Food monster- you know last night you had enough for leftovers tonight, but alas someone attacked the fridge. Nothing is left. There is nothing there. when you question who did it, the answer is "not me" So it MUST be the Food monster, right?

The sleep monster- This is the one that doesn't allow you to get out of bed in the morning. As you hit the snooze button ONE more time for just FIVE MORE MINUTES. You have been taken over by the sleep monster.

The messy monster- Ya know the day when you spent the day before cleaning putting everything back in its place, but then you realize that everything is out of place again!! ARGH!! the messy monster has hit you.

The monster on the bed- no wait thats just the hubby snoring. my bad.

The remote control monster- It disappears on its own.. the remote can not be found .. or did someone steal it. mmm hmmm..

The clothes stealing monster- This monster steals Mom's and Dad's clothes and puts them in the teenagers rooms and sometimes DIRECTLY on the teenager who claims "I don't know HOW it got up in my room" AHA! the answer!!

Edited to add because my friend Michele pointed it out to me:

Paci Monster- Baby can have three pacifiers and then poof they are gone! Where did they go.. only the paci monster knows!!

Ponytail Monster- You know the package says 48 on it... how is it one week after you get them you are down to four?!?!?! WTH!!!!!

Key Monster- You put the keys down when you got home, you know where you put them. You KNOW you know where they were.. dammit.. they are gone NOW... You can look and look and look but they are MIA. Sighs. by the time you steal your spouses keys leave and come back the other set is back.. hmm temporary key vacation? Maybe.. just maybe.

::sighs::: where is the peace and tranquility monster? I want to be visited by that one. Or the "surprise you won the lottery monster" that one can visit more then once..we will even let him sleep under the bed.. or hell on TOP!! Or the "I cleaned the whole house for you" Monster.. that would be nice. No I get the mess makers, the food eaters, the remote contol and sock stealers. Yep, monsters.. the next time your kids tell you something under the bed is drooling.. trust them or you may find out in the morning you are missing a sock.

1 comment:

Mel said...

i hate that you gave Chuck an out with telling him about the key monster.

FYI peace and tranquility is a fairy (like the tooth chick!) I hear that iron is bad for fairies, so we need to move to the country and get away from all the nasty stuff here in town..oh wait that would solve most of the stress right there. (unless you are a my mom's with the freakin ghost that only pops in when i'm trying to go to sleep!)

I know the money monster. We've named him..he's invited to the family reunion next year. I know him better than I do my half sister. (eye roll)

I thought I moved away from my clothes monster...seems one of yours likes my stuff too. (wink)

okay..back to watching TAKING CHANCE...pass the tissues.